Drop 001 — in stock
Official merch. Unofficial theology.
Survivor Disaster Brands. Printed to order in the US, shipped USPS, paid with a real card. The satire is the print. The invoice is sincere.
SDB-004
Fourth of the Month Club Tee
Heavyweight cotton for a holiday the reader never observed. The print is the joke. The shirt is inventory.
$36.00
Choose size
SDB-VINYL
Window Vinyl Hoodie
Wear the sign. Become the plaza. Independent parody — not a participating location, not Yum!, not USDA.
$68.00
Choose size
SDB-07
Insufficient Baja Tote
Declined so often it became a bag. Holds the groceries the program actually covers.
$24.00
SDB-VINYL-MINI
The Sign Said Sticker Pack
Three die-cuts. Apply to any surface that needs a participating-location energy without the enrollment.
$12.00
SDB-0114
Graveyard Shift Candle
Notes of nacho cheese, warm asphalt, and a manager who went home. Lights the night shift.
$22.00
US shipping $6.95 · 7–14 days · 30-day returns on unworn goods